A Race Against Time

26/02/23 – Rob, Mike

Mirroring the name of the passage we were heading for, we started the day not by driving to Stoney but by having A RACE AGAINST TIME to Decathlon to rectify a near neoprene related catastrophe. Comically oversized wetsuits exchanged, we turned towards to Stoney and parked up at the hut. Plymouth Uni were still inside, so we got changed outside like [insert Hoody expletive] animals.

The walkers had gone to Lathkill Dale today but we soon commenced our own lovely walk up the hill to Cliffstile instead. Ignoring the ominously dark clouds overhead, we rigged our rope from the insitu anchors and headed on down to Moorwood Sough, the main drain for the area.

The Stoney half of Moorwood can be a proper drag. It’s quite low in places, it weaves around all over the shop, and it seems to take forever to get upstream. So much so it once mentally malfunctioned an already tired, 6ft+ Sampo on the return journey. So exasperated with constantly twatting his head, he eventually punched an arch. That’s still the only time I’ve seen a man punch an arch – and I inspect bridges for a living so I have ample opportunity to witness such things. Descending Cliffstile essentially halves the distance and as we headed upstream we were reassured by how comparatively low the water was. The shortened distance also allowed us to properly admire the fantastic stonework, rather than just charging through.

It’d been a few years since we’d been up the sough but my route finding skills up until this point had been impeccable… “go down shaft, go upstream”. However, as soon as we entered the NCP carpark and had to do some actual route finding, I got cave-dementia and sent us to the Boil Up. I handed Rob my phone with the survey and it was quickly (embarrassingly) discovered I’d been confusing depth with height. I thought I was on a Lakeland fell and had been reading everything inversely, like we were in opposite-world. Back on track, we headed for the Wet West and I eventually started remembering the place. Much like Gandalf in the Mines of Moria after he has a puff on his “medicinal” pipe. Only I didn’t then confidently lead us towards a massive Balrog, high as a kite.

Up the next ladder, then the klettersteig mud slope, then along to the bottom of THE ladder – this one ladder must link together some of the best (the best?) caving in Stoney. Snack time here and we left behind the one SRT kit we’d brought with us in case we could exit via Cussey, then up we went.

Reaching the start of the connection dig (Vulgarious Bastard), this was now all brand new for us and I was excited to finally see some of the new mega stuff. We donned hoods, mainly to keep the slop out of our ears/face/nose, and wallowed on in. It starts stooping, then as a hands and knees crawl, then lowers to flat out in water. This is then followed by a short climb down a rift then out through the bottom into some lovely slop that has the appearance and consistency of brown custard. All in all, passage fun rating a perfect 5/7 – full credit to all involved in digging it.

This (at times pretty small) passage then spits you out into the significantly larger A Race Against Time, the passage we’d come to see and it didn’t disappoint. It’s a magnificent section of cave for the Stoney area. We headed upstream first to have a look at the Boil Up Sump 2. This provides access to the Stoney Middleton Master Cave proper and is a free-dive when the water’s low and if you’re brave enough. Being very not-brave, we retraced our steps and turned downstream to enjoy the stomping big walking passage which stretched out before us. This eventually lowers to hands and knees and resembles similar passages in Stoney developed along the Lower Shell Bed. Just before reaching the downstream sump, the most amazing shell bed is encountered with fossilised brachiopods the size of potatoes.

On the way back upstream, I had a quick crawl up a tiny branch on the true left side of the passage. It initially looked really unpromising but after a bit of ferreting, it quickly turned a corner, heading upstream away from the main passage and has airspace continuing beyond. I’d imagine it’s way down the list of leads for the guys pushing the SMMC though, being tiny, half full of silt and heading in the ‘wrong’ direction.

With that, we re-hooded and wriggled back out through Vulgarious, pretty chuffed to have finally seen just a small section of the new stuff. Return journey went smoothly, although Rob briefly scared the living shit out of me as he waited back in the Wet West. He was completely mud camouflaged like Arnie in Predator and I’d got up to within a metre of him before being confronted by a pair of floating white eyes. I should’ve said something like “Go! Get to the laddaaa!”, but all I managed to do was stifle a genuine yelp of fear.

I had a quick look at the Cussey connection on our return to the ladder, but it was still sumped – as it had been when we’d visited the other side of it back in Jan. So off we trotted back to Moorwood, where we were able to wash off most of the Vulgarious mud before heading back up Cliffstile.

Rope pulled out, lid closed, we walked back down the hill to Stoney just as the sky was tuning pink in the gloaming. We’ll have to return when the water’s even lower and we’ve plucked up enough courage to look at the sump. If A Race Against Time is anything to go, the Master Cave must be really something.

Great food back at the hut, great trip, great day.